Source: Adult Industry News
By: Julie Wild
Hi my name is Julie Wild and welcome to my weekly column, Ask a Swinger. I am 39 years old and a Sex, Love and Intimacy Coach in Atlanta Georgia. I offer in person coaching sessions and nationwide phone sex coaching sessions. In my personal life I have been happily married for many years and my husband and I have been active in the alternative lifestyle for our entire adult life.
I started my weekly column Ask a Swinger to answer questions about sex, fantasies, the alternative lifestyle and other adult sensitive topics. How many times have you had a question, but no one to ask or no one to tell. If you would like to find out more about my swinging lifestyle, please visit my web site, JoinJulie.com.
If you have a question you would like to ask me about any adult topic, please feel free to e mail me your questions. I will not use your real name or e mail address in my column. From time to time in my column, I will share some of my personal stories and experiences in the lifestyle. If you plan to attend the lifestyle convention in Las Vegas in July, please let me know. I would love to meet you in person.
This weeks hot topics,
Dear Julie,
Help ! I am newly married and my husband would like to experience anal sex. This is something we have never tried before. I would really like to please him, but I have no idea how to prepare or what to expect.
Jenny Gainesville FL
Dear Jenny,
First you need to keep in mind that anal sex is very different than vaginal sex, the anus does not produce a natural lubricant like the vagina, so make sure you have plenty of lubricant on hand. You need to be very relaxed and find a position that is comfortable. I find that doggie style is the best position for the first time, standing next to the edge of the bed, gently bending your knee and resting it on the edge of the bed, allowing time to breath deep. Please explain to your husband that you are willing to try if he is willing to go slow and easy the first time.
Don’t be disappointed if it does not work the first time, just like anything else, practice makes perfect. If possible, have a glass of wine ahead of time to help you relax and don’t forget to remind your husband how lucky he is to have you. Keep me posted.
Dear Julie,
My wife and I just moved into a new home. Our neighbors invited us over for dinner this past Saturday. After dinner, they suggested we take a dip in their pool. We offered to go home and get our suits, but they said no need, we can wear our birthday suits. They immediately stripped down and jumped into the pool. My wife and I are very open minded ( plus we had finished off about three bottles of wine) so we took our clothes off and jumped in too.
After some innocent splashing around, we moved into the hot tub. We were in the hot tub for about 30 minutes when we decided to call it a night. After my wife and I got home, she told me that the neighbors wife was playing with her pussy in the hot tub.
She was so shocked she did not know what to say or do. We have always been interested in the alternative lifestyle, but have never been able to meet the right people. Do you think we have hit the jackpot? What do we do now?
Steve Spokane Washington
Dear Steve,
I am assuming that your wife was turned on by the idea of experimenting with another woman. I think that they have given you a big hint that they are interested in the two of you. I would suggest that you invite them over (hopefully you have a hot tub too) and try to recreate the magic and see where it goes. I would suggest if it is your next door neighbors, that you set up some boundaries ahead of time, just in case it does not work out.
Playing with your neighbors can be uncomfortable if it does not work out, but if it is a positive situation, a good time will be had by all. Will you invite me to your block party?
Dear Julie,
I am happily married for almost 20 years. I have a fantasy that I dream about each night. I want to be with a woman who is lactating and taste her sweet mother’s milk. I am really not interested in having any sex, I would just like to nurse. Have you ever heard of this before.
Kevin Atlanta Georgia
Dear Kevin,
This is a very common fantasy. A lot of men develop this fantasy if their wives do not breast feed or did not allow them to experiment while they were lactating. There are a lot of women that offer this service. You can find providers for this service on the internet or please e mail me directly and I can refer you to sites that advertise for milk maids. Enjoy!
Dear Julie,
I am engaged to a beautiful girl. Early in our relationship, she revealed to me that before we met, she worked as an escort through college to support herself and pay for college. I didn’t think this would bother me, but as the wedding day draws near, I find myself thinking about this more and more.
I don’t know if I can handle the fact that she has had sex with so many partners. To make matters worse, she has said that the money is so good and it was so enjoyable, that she would consider doing it again in the future.
Jake Austin TX
Dear Jake,
Your fiance’ was honest with you from the beginning. Please keep in mind that this was a business decision for her. You should not confuse her work as an escort with the love she feels for you. As for the number of partners, you probably would not hold it against her if she was just a wild girl in college. So you need to let that go. You need to be honest with her about your feelings and how you feel about the idea of her working as an escort in the future.
Please do not move forward with the marriage, until you are absolutely sure you can work through this. You need to work on learning to separate sex from love. I am sure your fiance’ has already mastered that concept.
If you would like to send Julie your questions, please e mail Julie@JulieWild.com for more information on Julie’s coaching services, please visit JulieWild.com linked in the box to the right.
