The Facts of Life: A Porn Parody

For nearly ten years Gram Ponante has been earning a living writing about-and perhaps even inspiring-American and international pornography. But, with the recent release of his directorial debut “The Facts of Life: A Porn Parody,” Ponante became a full-fledged pornographer.

“I didn’t have the budget for Anal,” Ponante writes in his new Ebook a Porn Valley Odyssey: Making ‘the Facts of Life XXX,’ “But that didn’t stop me from directing the Greatest Porn Movie Ever Made.”

Of course, Ponante’s “Facts of Life” porn parody (which happens to be the second “Facts of Life” porn parody), is not the greatest porn movie ever made, merely an excellent one.

Coinciding with the release of DreamZone Entertainment’s “The Facts of Life: A Porn Parody,” Ponante’s 60-page book-available for $5.99 on Amazon.com and at GramPonante.com-details the particular process of writing, casting, and filming a porn movie.

The making-of book places the current porn parody craze in context, giving hype-saturated readers not only a How, but a Why porn parodies are so popular.

“Thrill to the story of the Three Tooties,” Ponante writes. “Recoil at the Long-Remembered Smell, Peek at Ashli Orion’s panties, Clap in amazement at the World’s Best Porn Script-and Weep at its compromise!” Ponante was tutored by parody king Lee Roy Myers, who also provided the novice director with a professional crew, including Paul Woodcrest, Seth’s Beard, Chad Pole, Glenn Alfonso, Freddy Fingers, and Hi-Fi AL. Ponante wrote what he calls a “Terry Southern-esque” script of the goings-on at Yeastland Academy and cast Kristina Rose, Ashli Orion, Raylene, Lee Bang, Ryan Mclane, Kodi Gamble, Bobbi Brixton, Coffee Brown, Anthony Rosano, and Rocco Reed, with a wistful and otherworldly theme song by Fogelfoot. “I’ve been covering porn sets for years for great publications like AVN, Genesis, Hustler, Playboy, and XBIZ,” Ponante says, “and I knew that directing a porn movie took a particular genius of organization, compromise, and patience, if not a genius of artistic talent.” On his own movie, Ponante confirmed a suspicion that the best pornographers know when to stop taking themselves so seriously.

“Directing my own 2-day wonder gave me an even greater appreciation of the men and women in porn who work for a living,” Ponante says, “and who are able to siphon off a little bit of truth, beauty, and humor from the creampies.”

A Porn Valley Odyssey: Making “The Facts of Life XXX” is available for $5.99 at GramPonante.com and on Amazon’s Kindle Shop.