Source: Adult Industry News
By: Fawnia Dietrich
Fawnia’s Showroom Review is back! And in better shape than ever, I might add! Since her last column over five years ago, Fawnia Mondey, now Fawnia Dietrich, has been running a successful dance studio in Las Vegas. Click the links to the right for her and check out her sites. Here is Fawnia’s Showroom Review of The Lumberyard Strip Club in Des Moines, Iowa:
Fawnia’s Showroom Review: The Lumberyard Strip Club
You know the saying, “Well that’s a first.” These were my thoughts exactly when I survived my experience at the Lumberyard in Des Moines, Iowa.
My husband and I were treated to a night out with a couple local to Des Moines. We sat on the lower level of this three tiered club and ordered drinks. What struck me first as being very strange was the lack of dancers approaching us. In fact, the girls didn’t even look in our direction. Do they not know that women have money too? And some women like myself love to spend it on great dancers, and so do our husbands!
Frustrated, I made my way to the bathroom and upon opening the door, I noticed there was just one stall! Plus, this bathroom was directly next to the main room of the club and the door didn’t lock! Ok, gotta pee quick… Dammit, no toilet paper! What kind of club doesn’t have any toilet paper in their one stall?! I left the bathroom and headed to the main entrance to find some toilet paper. I felt so fortunate when they handed me a roll, and went back to “handle my business.”
Getting back to my seat, I asked “So did any girls come up to you guys yet?” “No, none!” they replied. Jen and I got up and took liberty of changing this pathetic situation. We saw a dancer getting change, and approached her. She was one of the prettier and fit girls at the club and looked sweet.
“We would like a dance.” I cheerfully announced. She seemed a little surprised and shy, but proceeded to take us upstairs to ‘VIP’. We sat in these massive tall couches, and enjoyed our one song with little miss ‘Shy’. Before we said goodbye, we gave her the advice to approach female costumers at the club because women spend money on dances too. I honestly don’t think she cared or was in the business of making money. In fact this club was strange in even more ways.
My husband thought it would be fun to sit in front row. So there he sat with a $20 in hand while we three witnessed him unsuccessful try to tip a dancer! This was the funniest thing! Watching this dancer approach men and grind her ass in their faces for $1, then skip my husband completely and move to the next guy! WTF. What is up with these dancers?
You know you are not in Las Vegas when you can’t get a dance and you can’t spend money! On our way out I asked for a business card. This place must be talked about. I was introduced to the owner. “I don’t have any business cards.” He shrugged me off, like he could really care less about his costumers. “You don’t have a business card?” I questioned, shockingly. “No,” and that was it. “You will be very sorry.” I stated, and in turning to walk out of the club, I saw another bathroom, with a working door lock and toilet paper. Unbelievable that the staff wouldn’t suggest to us as females, that we could use this bathroom instead of one literally inside the club without a lock!
I thought I had seen it all, but this trip to the Lumberyard was an eye opener in how NOT to run your business. The Lumberyard has a lot of potential. With their three stages, 10 poles, and shower stage, all that’s missing is proper management. Boys, I am sure you will love the Lumberyard though. Visit them on the weekends for the most variety of ladies, and to see their amateur contest. Plus, remember to BYOB.
See their website at www.iwantwood.com/ “Where real men go for wood.” [Their website consists of three flyers for their three clubs. I’m not even going to bother to link them to Fawnia’s review of this extremely mediocre club. -Ed.]
Sexy, healthy wishes,
Fawnia Dietrich
Studio: 702-878-7653
