Shay’s Weekly Wash #06

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Source: Adult Industry News

By: Shay Boogie

Shay Boogie

– I just found out through the grapevine that my favorite freckle-faced redbone Courtney Devine is no longer doing adult movies… is this really true?! Say it ain’t so! My weekend is officially ruined!

– The other night a few of my friends and I went to a local strip club. Granted we didn’t think we’d see the crème de LA crème of women on a Wednesday evening at 11:45 p.m., but we weren’t prepared for what was awaiting us. All five of us were sitting by the stage when this big busted blonde approached us. She looked decent from afar but the closer she got, the more hideous-looking she became. Not only did she have one of the worst boob jobs we had ever seen (they looked like over-ripe cantaloupes) but she must have been around 40-years-old. The kicker, though, was when she started dancing in front of us (mind you we hadn’t pulled out any money for her) and knelt down to show us her titties. Right in the middle of them was a huge red pimple! It was so nasty that we had to turn our heads. How in the world could she go on stage with a nasty-ass pimple right between her two ta-ta’s? Will wonders never cease…

– I have to give a nice “pat on the back” to the Zero Tolerance crew for their superior customer relations department. I went on their website and e-mailed them with a few questions. Within half-an-hour I got two responses back from two different individuals. They were very friendly and answered all of my questions. ZT truly exemplifies the phrase “customers comes first”.

– One of the first adult-oriented websites I remember being a regular visitor to was Kara Davis’ site. Not only was she gorgeous and have tantalizing titties, but there was loads of free footage and pics. Her shower scenes were some of the best that I had ever seen. I have to give credit where credit is due. Most people’s personal sites usually are stale and have the same boring themes. Kara’s is always fresh and each year it gets better and better. And Kara, if you ever read this and are looking for some new dicks to play around with, Steve knows how to get in contact me.

– My new fetish for this week is squirters. Three of the best ones I’ve seen are Aria, Lily Thai, and Bella Marie Wolf. They literally were gushing like sprinklers. My question is, when they spray onto the camera-lens who has the lucky job of cleaning it up? Possibly a new genre/fetish could be Squirt-Licker-Uppers… or ‘SLIs’ for short. Hmmm… that has a nice ring to it, huh? I better copyright that shit fast!

– I was watching Cum Dumpsters Vol. 1 the other night and there’s still one clip that just totally cracks me up. This one girl gets cum splattered onto her nose and face and she is totally disgusted by it. She stares at the camera with a look of death on her face, as if she’s going to strangle someone. I felt like screaming “Bitch, the movie’s called ‘Cum Dumpsters’. What the fuck did you think you were going to be doing… baking cookies?”

– Wanna check out a really cool website? Dragginladies.com is a site devoted to adult stars who smoke cigarettes in real life. Nothing exudes sex better than Loni getting fucked hard while trying to keep the Marlboro she’s sucking on from falling onto her breasts.

– The most annoying thing in porn has to be when a girl is screaming in pleasure but sounds so fake. On the other hand, I’ve seen many movies where the guy is fucking the girl really good but you don’t hear one word coming from her lips. Why would a girl get into porn if she just lies there like a dead fish? It makes no sense to me. You know what else is annoying? When some guys just don’t know when to shut-up during their scene. They go on and on about how good the pussy is or how good the head they’re getting is. Believe me man, we know how good it is. A few “ooh’s and ahhh’s” is ok but, please, keep it down to a dull roar.

– Do you know how tough a decision it is to pick what porn I want to jerk off to sometimes? I mean, all the choices I have… West Coast’s ‘Latin Booty Talk’, Digital Sin’s ‘Nuttin’ Hunnies’, Platinum X’s ‘Baker’s Dozen #2’, etc. The anticipation I get everytime I approach my closet full of DVDs is inexplicable. I’m like a little kid in a candy store. Pretty pitiful, huh?